Happy Inferior Meat Day

Enjoy your meal. I am sure that your 30 hour process to create a bird that almost kinda not dry if you cover it in enough gravy is a huge success and that anything crunchy has been barred from your table like a nice Thanksgiving discussion of politics with your extended family.

At least we can now go another 11 months without every cooking website being overwhelmed with everyone pretending there’s a way to make this meal good by using more or less the traditional foods.

Also, in the hierarchy of pies, both pumpkin and pecan rank at the very bottom. Apple rules, objectively.