Sometimes an F-150 is just a substitute for anxieties about size

Here at LGM we absolutely will not countenance phrases like “tiny dick energy,” which can easily mushroom into a storm of limp jokes about . . . ah forget it Jake, it’s TrumpLand:

The crowd size obsession has been there from the very beginning, i.e., January 20, 2017, which might have been a clue to lots of Very Serious People in the media that waiting for the day that Donald Trump became president would be like waiting for a surprise proposition from Gal Gadot.

Has there ever been Trump Wine? It seems like the kind of thing that would almost would have had to exist at some point during the 45 years this guy has been polluting the collective American consciousness. Like Trump himself, if that means it turns to vinegar, it does. If that means it gets better with age, it don’t.