Home / General / Another cunning plan by the House GOP in response to Democratic treachery

Another cunning plan by the House GOP in response to Democratic treachery

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The plan: Throw the Speaker’s gavel around while screaming “Here, hold this for me!” and farting nervously.

I think?

Ohio Rep. Jim Jordan won’t hold a third speaker vote today, sources tell CNN, as he has struggled to flip Republican holdouts and was at risk of bleeding more support.

A source said Jordan will continue his speakership bid and try to shore up votes. He is not dropping out.

This is like herpes thinking it will be more popular if it goes away for a few months and then comes back.

Jordan is now also leaning toward backing a resolution to empower interim Speaker Patrick McHenry, sources said.

Jordan supports allowing McHenry to serve in a temporary capacity until January, according to an ally of the speaker designee. The idea here, the person said, is to give Jordan more time to build support without the chaos of speaker-less House.

As with all things GOP, that isn’t an idea. That is a loose collection of vague wishes glued together with spite. Jimbo’s problem isn’t the chaos his party is causing. His problem is he’s too disgusting for Republicans.

And since I started writing this, his fellow Republicans have taken a dump on the “idea.”

Several House Republicans opposed to Jim Jordan’s speakership bid are pushing back on reports that he plans to continue his quest for the gavel despite canceling a third speaker vote today.

Nebraska Rep. Don Bacon told CNN that Jordan “needs to get out,” saying it would be a problem for him if there isn’t a third round of voting but the Ohio Republican remains in the race as the speaker designee. 

And from a curse Maryland placed on Texas for some reason (sorry y’all), there’s this.

Reps. Ralph Norman of South Carolina and Chip Roy of Texas, two House Republican hard-liners, told CNN today they remain opposed to a proposed resolution to empower interim Speaker Patrick McHenry. 

 “We’re supposed to choose the speaker. It’s in the Constitution. There’s a Senate pro tem. There’s not a speaker pro tem,” Roy told CNN. 

A person who isn’t Very Serious might begin to consider entertaining the possibility that decades of huffing hatred have made it impossible for the Republican party to engage in any sort of planning that doesn’t involve finding someone who is weaker and kicking them.

People who post off-topic comments smell like Jim Jordan looks.

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