The wargle bargle on Christmas – The battle of Bad Santa!
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It is inevitable that the sort of people who think Christians in the U.S. are being persecuted by Starbucks cups would get bored with fondling their Baby Jesus manger figurines and find some other way people are doing Christmas wrong.
Why Santa Claus Without Jesus Is Cultural Appropriation At Its Stupidest
Modern pop culture has turned Santa into a figure almost completely removed from his origins, and it’s time to go back to the beginning and remember the real Saint Nick.
As a liberal of color, my shorts are thoroughly frosted by the use of the term cultural appropriation. Grr. Grr I say. Or Boo hoo. Whatever.
Despite the centuries since his life and the vacuous books and movies portraying him as a jolly traveling toy store, history is pretty clear on many of the details of Saint Nick’s life. None of these details involve a Christ-less Christmas, and instead tell us of a devout and generous man.
For example:
Nicholas of Myra (present-day Turkey) argued with Arius at the Council of Nicea over the relationship between God the Father and God the Son, and when Arius wouldn’t stop being a heretic, tradition holds Nicholas slapped Arius. It is short-sighted to think that theological differences were amicable until recently, and this disagreement is a perfect example that religion has been infuriating people since the beginning.
Sure, I can see why slapping people who won’t “stop being heretics” would appeal to Der Federalist and its readers.
After his smack-down of a false teacher and the completion of the Nicene Creed, Saint Nick went on to be a little more calm, and it’s his later life that inspires Santa Claus. He is credited with throwing coins for dowries into the shoes of poor girls so they could get married. From this comes our modern practice of presents in stockings.
Given St. Nicholas’ history of hitting people, it could also be the origin of using a sock filled with pennies to belt people over the head!
The author is silent on the topic of presents under a tree vs. presents in a stocking. Scheer is also silent on such issues as the fact that Santa Claus is a hybrid of a number of figures, some completely made up; that the Original St. Nicholas’ act of charity had zip to do with Christmas; the turbulent history of Christmas celebrations and whether the fact he gave gifts to young women should cause the MRAs to hop up and down yell about misandry, gold diggers and alpha males.
Of course, facts and curiosity have no place in these attempts to dictate the One True Way to celebrate Christmas. An interest in facts would keep members of the right wing citizens brigade like Scheer from wresting strawmen for strawJesus and writing things like this:
Some parents want an a-religious figure to replace Jesus at Christmas, and when they think that figure is Santa Claus they should realize they’re sadly misinformed about the nature of Saint Nick. Lauding an atheist Santa is akin to co-opting any historical figure passionate about his beliefs and turning him into a hero devoid of the very faith that inspired them.
Like … turning a Jewish man from the Middle East who preached about peace, humility and minding one’s business into a blond haired, blue eyed, mean-spirited, panty-sniffing, jackass who supports the worst sort of capitalists and bigots, including anti-Semites?
Agreed, people shouldn’t do that.
