Win or lose – 7 predictions
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I’m going to maintain my streak of not predicting the winner of the election because the last time I did: 4 more years of G.W. Bush. However, I do feel comfortable predicting what will follow the election, no matter who wins:
1. Trump will announce that he’s the victor and the theme of his speech will revenge.
2. Violent Trump supporters will continue to be violent. Non-violent Trump supporters will insist the violence doesn’t count and shouldn’t be mentioned because they don’t want anyone to mention it.
3. Democrats will be urged not to hold grudges about (i.e. mention at all), anything that happened during the election. No, not even that. Shut up.
4. The results will be proof that Democrats need to cooperate with Republicans. (Kiss the right cheek first, THEN the left, then the middle.)
5. Republicans will devote more energy to disenfranchising voters who aren’t white (see #2).
6. Six more weeks of EMAILZ! EMAILZ! EMAILz1.
7. At least 500 katrillion words about what the results mean for President Obama’s legacy.
