Doing SEK’s Shtick Except with Cussing
My father is flying in today to visit his grandson and me, and to act as another pair of hands. I got a wild hair up my butt yesterday and decided to reserve a limo to bring him to the house. I think limos are kind of silly, and I’ve been in one exactly once in my life, but I thought “What the hell?” So I called this limo/shuttle service and had the following approximate conversation with the dispatcher:
Me: Hi, my father’s flying in to visit me. Do you have any limos available for tomorrow?
Dispatcher: Yes, as a matter of fact, we do.
Me: Great. Could you give me a rough estimate of how much it costs to have him shuttled from the airport to my house?
*boring cost talk*
Me: Awesome. Let’s book a limo.
Dispatcher: Oh no. I just checked…we have no limo for tomorrow.
Inner Me: Goddammit. Fuck.
Dispatcher: We have a beautiful Mercedes sedan available. He’ll definitely feel like he’s in a nice car.
Inner Me: Well, fuckin’ A. If I wanted that experience I could just pick him up in the Infiniti. A sedan is not a fucking limo, is it?
Dispatcher: Well, we also have a limo van available.
Me: I think I want to go with the van.
Dispatcher (sounding skeptical): I’m just afraid your father will feel overwhelmed.
Inner Me: That’s kind of the fucking point of a limo, isn’t it? I didn’t call to book a fucking a Ford Taurus.