Supersize My Abortion

I wrote the following entry a few months ago, but I’m doing an encore presentation of it here because I think it serves as a nice addendum to Scott’s post from earlier today.

Kevin Williamson, Internet-famous for writing a couple of screeds about about women being money-hungry, status-seeking hoors and little else, temporarily removed Mitt Romney’s penis from his mouth and stopped fapping to his Romney/Ryan slashfic so he could appear on “Up.” There he used a phrase I would like to douse in gasoline and burn atop the ash heap of history. The phrase is “abortion on demand,” and its inanity is nothing less than breathtaking.

It’s a favorite of the wingnut world, and if you hear a person use it, recognize it for the red flag that it is. It’s meant to imply that abortion is crudely common and that the women who have abortion are crude and common. They want you to picture some mangy-looking broad in hotpants and a tube top** sauntering up to a counter and saying “Gimme the fish fillet sandwich, a large Coke and an abortion. Oh, and super-size it.” A lot women have abortions. A lot of women have them for convenience. But none of them have them for fun. But because making women who have abortions into caricatures is the only way to win the debate over reproductive rights, wingnuts will double down on this stereotype: women who have abortions are just lazy, irresponsible sluts who have no regard for human life.

The phrase is also comically inept because it implies that abortions could happen in a manner that does not involve “demand” in some form. I mean, I’m sure forced abortion is a thing (and the idea of it disgusts me), but I’m guessing it’s stunningly rare (especially in this country). Unless the morons who use this phrase are simply put out that some women have not asked politely for their abortions. None of this ON DEMAND stuff. I’m suddenly picturing thousands of women plunking some money on a counter and screaming “GIVE ME MY LAVENDER-SCENTED RELAXATION ABORTION  NOW, BITCHES! AND SUPER-SIZE IT!”

For the record, I’ve searched and searched for Abortion on my cable’s On Demand menu, and I have never found it.

I mean, at some point, women will have to communicate the wish to have to an abortion (if they desire one), and this communication will be either verbal, signed or written. Because how else will women demand their “Bella and Edward Vampire-Human Hybrid No Workee So Good Commemorative Abortion’?* Then again, a decent woman might send her request via carrier pigeon. It’s more proper.

*available only at participating Happy Good Funtime Abortions and Tanning

UPDATE: **As I clarify downthread, when I use these descriptors I’m being stream of conscious here and using language I might imagine an asshole would use. Use. Also, I don’t give a shit what a woman wears when she gets an abortion, nor do I make it a habit of calling women “broads.”