Recently In Funny At McSweeny’s
By “Excerpts From Steamy Romance Novels for Parents of Young Children,” very good:
Their eyes met across a landscape of wooden blocks and small cars and plastic dinosaurs that really hurt if you stepped on them at night while getting a child a sippy cup of water. He searched her face for exhaustion, and found it.
[…]
While Elijah was off playing at a friend’s house, he trimmed the shrubs and she mulched the flowerbeds. Later, over glasses of wine, they agreed: It had been really fun.
“An Open Letter to Friends and Family Regarding Inquiries About My Reproductive Plans,” even better:
Response time ranges from three seconds to never and is influenced by factors such as the volume of reproduction-related queries received, whether the inquiry is excessively irritating (see Content section above), and my mood. Please note that the tone of my response, if you receive one at all, may vary from genuinely introspective to deeply sarcastic.