Mark Sanford’s Omnipotent Penis

ShorterVerbatim Roger L. Simon:

Nevertheless, Mark Sanford’s out-of-control Father’s Day jaunt to Buenos Aires is particularly ill-timed, not just because of the obvious disrespect to his wife, children, friends, citizens of his state, political party, etc.

Reason: IRAN.

At this moment, the eyes of this country should be fixed on the horrific events coming from that company and the struggle for freedom against all odds by many of its brave citizens. They need our support more than anything.

Sadly, I’m quite sure this isn’t a joke. I think this “Mark Sanford’s inability to keep it his pants will obstruct Iranian democracy” theory might be even more implausible than the stuff about Obama and the ice cream. I also suspect that the Iranian opposition can think of a rather large number of things they need more than an adjustment in the news-to-gossip ratio of US cable TV, leaving aside the question of whether it will be Iran or, say, “John and Kate Plus Who the Hell Cares” coverage that gets preempted by Sanford’s desire to, er, “walk the Appalachian trail” with a woman not his wife…