And the town charter also gives the constable "two comely lasses of virtue true"

Shorter Robert Turner: “A bullshit law passed during the brief period of Federalist dominance in the 1790s — and a law that has resulted in exactly one indictment and zero prosecutions (.pdf) in more than 200 years — should be unsheathed against Nancy Pelosi, who had the temerity to visit a nation with whom I wish the United States was formally at war.”

Shorter Treason-in-Defense-of-Slavery Yankee: “I’ve never heard of this law, but once I remove my wagging finger from my nose, I’m going to wag it like I’ve never wagged it before.”

Shorter Seaspook: “George W. Bush is a Nancy Boy for not enforcing this law.”