The Reviews Are In!

The General reviews one of the books well below even The Party of Death on my reading list, Mary Cheney’s recent apologia:

I’m not sure I understand why Miss Cheney became a Republican political operative. After all, the party isn’t exactly welcoming people like her–87% of all Republicans want to stone her to death and 92% want her to just shut up while they watch her make-out with another woman.

I imagine she has a good reason. Perhaps, she thinks a soul is a small price to pay for access to all that wealth and power, or maybe she was worried that Dick would shoot her in the face if she declined. In any event, she worked very hard to elect people who will do everything possible to deny her the benefits that come with achieving personhood. I like that about her. I wish more people would sacrifice their selfish desire to be treated with dignity in order to serve our betters more effectively.

Unfortunately, I can’t say that I enjoyed her book. There was far too much technical jargon. Take the phrase “hoo hoo” for instance. She keeps referring to it like it’s some kind of body part. I’ve never heard of it. Same goes for my wife, Ofjoshua. I asked her what a “hoo hoo” is, and she laughed and said, “Don’t worry, you’ll never see one.”

I was also disappointed with all her allusions to women having homosexual sex. I don’t know how many times I have to tell people this, but women can’t have sex with each other. They don’t have “little soldiers.”

All of which reminds me of the very silliest non-issue of the 2004 campaign. I think we can generally infer that gay rights crusades led by Pat Buchanan and featuring no actual gay people are probably phony…