Slant? 1.9. Speed? 6.5.

So your lineup has a number of problems; two washed-up first basemen, a hacktacular second baseman with shaky defense, at least two outfielders with no range, two who can’t throw. So what do you do? Why, of course, get another hacktacular second baseman with shaky defense into the lineup, keep the two washed-up first baseman, turn the old 2B into a LF who can’t hit, field or throw, and move your problematic, no-arm LF to centre. Genius! (Admittedly, the old CF went somewhere beyond “can’t throw” toward “Edgar Martinez could go from second to third on a MF8.”) And it’s already a smashing success! Ah, the last two days were a glorious feast of ressentiment.