CNN’s Finest Hour

CNN, why do you still exist? Your ratings are garbage and rotting daily. You don’t represent any constituency except for Beltway elites. You cover up for shoddy reporting and hackish analysis by investing in new technology that are meant to help us forget how bad you are. You whine about partisanship on FOX and MSNBC without actually producing quality coverage.

And then, after all that whining about the decline of cable news, you wrongly announce that the Supreme Court ruled to overturn Obamacare?

It’s gotten so bad that AP had to order its employees to stop making fun of you.

Christ, you’d all do better if you just handed Nancy Grace the keys to the building, let her talk about missing white women 24 hours a day.

But I’m sure that making your election night coverage 3-D will make us all forget this and start watching you again.